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You are currently reading lesson #2 in a series of posts titled “Lessons in Liberalism.” You can also view the others: Orientation, #1, #2, #3, #4, #5.

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Bush is the Answer to all of our Problems

Batman has The Joker, Superman has Kryptonite, Michael Moore has cheeseburgers and liberals have George W. Bush. I’m talking about our sworn enemy. The master of destruction, the lord of war, the man that is the perfect image of the ones we hate. How can you not hate Bush? Even his own party hates him. There are a lot of good reasons to hate Bush. The number one reason is that he is white. White people are the root of America’s problems. Even I hate white people and I’m white myself! Self hate is always encouraged in the Democratic party. Do you think that people like Cindy Sheehan like themselves? How could they?

Eight years is a long time. Most American’s memories don’t go back far enough to remember what they ate last week let alone a year ago. Since it has been almost seven years since the world trade center attacks and just as long since America has been attacked by terrorists it’s completely acceptable to act confused when people talk about 9/11. It is very important for the sake of the Democratic party that we all act like 9/11 never happened. This is imperative because we can’t allow people to think Bush accomplished anything. The Iraq War has been very expensive. Even though it has been criticized since day one the truth is that things in Iraq are getting progressively better. We cannot allow the citizens of America to feel like we can actually win this thing.

Reasons to Hate Bush

Because memory is something that Marijuana takes a toll on I am going to list the many reasons to hate Bush. If you plan on creating signs for a protest or arguing with someone about Bush I suggesting printing this list out and reading from them verbatim because we all know you don’t have the ability to memorize things or argue using your own intellect.

Bush is Behind the 9/11 Attacks

Liberals are a paranoid group of people. Because of this we have been wise to the terroristic acts of Bush. The worst of his acts of violence is his role in the September 11th attacks. The neoconservative freaks of America masterminded the attack on their own nation so that Bush could scare us all into obedience. Why would any US President, no matter how bad of one, would kill 3,000 of their own people. I’ll tell you why. So that he could invade Iraq and steal it’s oil! The facts are all out in front of you. Saddam was in on the job as well. That is the only reason the US was so successful in overturning his government. If you walk past the White House late at night with binoculars you can see Saddam walking around the White House lawn. It’s true. I read it on the Internet.

Video proof:

With all the awesomely blurry Youtube videos out there, the crazy people no one believes anyway and a creative imagination, it is very simple to believe that Bush was behind the WTC attacks. If you go to New York today you can still see these buildings standing. They simply used some invisible paint to cover up the buildings. If you look very close you can see the buildings as if they were never hit. You know why? Because they weren’t. When the planes got very close to the buildings they quickly pulled away so they wouldn’t hit. Then, the pilots radioed back to their base and the bombs in the WTC buildings were triggered. The passengers on the plane were taken to a secret government building where they live to this day. The plan that crashed in Pennsylvania was also a hoax. Want to know what it was? Mustard gas. Don’t you wish you had thought of it first!?

Bush Stole the 2000/2004 Elections

We don’t like thieves. Thieves are bad people. President Bush is the kind of guy that would steal classified documents at a National Archive by sticking them down his pants and socks. Wait, that was someone else. But he is definitely the kind of guy that would steal an election. With a brilliant mind like his there is no person that he couldn’t persuade into submission. Think about it. Bush won the 2004 elections by over three million votes. Can you imagine how much money he spent convincing these people to vote for him illegally? Liberalism is so strong that the only way it can lose is when someone cheats.

The first election Bush won was even worse.  How could a court not rule in favor of a liberal candidate? It’s a ludicrous thought. President Bush used the CIA and other super secret organizations to bully pollsters into discounting any votes for Al Gore. There was also many sighting of Megatron at various polls bullying the electronic voting booths into subtracting votes for Gore by the thousands. The great left did what they could, they even called in the Autobots, but they were unable to stop the Deceptacons from stealing Florida from Gore. Once the Deceptacons escaped to Jeb Bush’s underground cave there was no way to prove what had been done and that is how Bush snuck his way into the White House.

Bush is a Christian

Since the time of Moses Christians have been running around causing all sorts of trouble. It was bound to happen one day that a Christian would win the White House. Being the very first Christian ever to win the Presidency, President Bush has made it his duty to destroy the non-existent wall that separates church from state. The idea of separating the church and state is to benefit the believer rather than the government. That is why President Bush is trying to use the church to destroy liberal values. Bush’s plan is to infiltrate our schools with dangerous prayer so that our students have the opportunity to fulfil their rights as Americans. This must be stopped. If we do not overturn this madness brought on by Bush our favorite past times such as abortion will soon be nothing more than a memory.

Even though it’s possible to be a Democrat and Christian the only liberals that are Christians are lying about one or the other. It’s practically impossible to hold liberal ideals and Christian ones at the same time. If you are able to support killing babies and Jesus at the same time I’d love to hear your logic. The reality is that the belief system of a liberal is completely opposite of a believer.  We have clever ideas about how to act religious but it’s easy to see that it never works out quite the way we plan–just look at Obama. For Liberalism to reign supreme you shall have no other gods before it. I don’t care what you were raised to believe. Liberalism is the one and only true way.

Bush Bleeds Oil

Oil companies are the sort of companies that America doesn’t need. The less oil companies in existence the better. The reason for this is because Bush owns every single oil company in the United States. Whenever a new oil company comes into existent Bush Co. immediately springs into action and buys out that company. The War in Iraq is the cover up that they have used for years to fund their oil desires. When a soldier is shipped to Iraq they are not sent into battle. Instead, they are sent off to the millions of oil rigs owned by the Bush family. The reason that we do not know about this is because soldier’s are barred from contacting their loved ones and receive Neuralizer treatments before they are allowed to return home. Perfect ploy for a perfectly evil Bush.

There’s a lot of speculation going around about why gas prices are so high. It’s simple. Very few times in Bush’s life has he had a battle that he was unable to win with a little cash. The recent denial from car companies for Bush’s proposal that they give him 50% of their profits have cause Bush to take action. If people aren’t willing to buy gas then they are going to stop buying cars. The prospect of no running cars in America is exciting. That dream was recently squashed. Being as powerful as he is, Bush recently won his bid for complete automobile market control. That is why gas prices are starting to go down. Once Bush decides that he wants a bigger cut he will start to raise prices again. Keep an eye out for that. You’ll soon be driving a Ford Bush.

Learning to Hate is Part of the Job

We must put the fear of Bush into the hearts of the masses. If we are able to implant Bush’s face next to the Republican party for the rest of eternity we will have the upper hand in every race until the end of time. The ability to demean a sitting president is something liberals and the Democratic party take pride in. The difference between truth and lies to us is the level of skill it takes to convince others of them. We aren’t concerned about truth or morality. The only goal for us is to see ourselves as god-like figures. Like gods we yearn for the worship of the world. Lord Obama has accomplished more with less experience than any other liberal in history. To think the most liberal Democrat in the United States could be president makes me cry tears of joy.

The Bush label has already been put into effect for this year’s election. Have you heard the term McBush yet? It’s humorous to relate McCain to Bush when they are almost complete opposites. At least Bush tries to be conservative. McCain has thrown the idea of conservatism out the window long away. We don’t care about the similarities or differences. If we can find the smallest of words or actions that are similar then we can run wild with it. McCain is simply the next Bush in line. Thirty years from now we will still be doing the exact same thing because we are unable to argue our point of view effectively enough. All we can do is attack others. Why are people so excited about a party with absolutely no realistic ideas?

Related Posts

• Putting Your New Found Wisdom Into Effect
• Knowing Your Enemies
• The Foundations of Liberalism
• Lessons in Liberalism: Orientation
• Lessons in Liberalism

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