I’m sure you’ve read about all of those fantasies, the fairy tales, the “happily ever afters.” Marriage is a wonderful union of a man and a women and I am very happy with the one I love, that’s not to say we haven’t had out battles. When two people decide to tie the knot everything is crazy and out of order. The cake, the dress, the house, the bills, but the one thing most aren’t thinking about is the fights. One thing you are guaranteed to have in marriage is fights.

Being married for almost 18 months has allowed me to see what being a newly wed is all about. It starts with the butterflies which lead up to the wedding, the wonderful ceremony, the love in the air and being surrounded by your family and friends. A month or two passes and the excitement settles down and you quickly realize it’s not so easy anymore. Is marriage as great as it seems? Of course not. It’s not all bad either.

Marriage for a man is a lot of work. Most women dream about the day that they get to tie the knot. As men we get comfortable with the idea overtime and allow ourselves to go into marriage because we love the one we’re with. What no one tells us is that marriage is a lot of work, or we just don’t list, either way we’re left in the dark. Marriage is all about working with your other half. I don’t know what it is about being a man–maybe it’s the testosterone–but compromise is a hard pill to swallow. It’s hard but well worth it.

The lesson of this article is that marriage is not easy. This is an apparent notion for most but some people seem to not realize this and find themselves struggling to maintain their marriage. For marriage to work you need two people willing to work through the worst of times. The good times are easy to handle, it’s those hards ones that are more common and bring the worst out in us. This is why so many people get divorced. They give up. I don’t believe that people grow apart over time. I think they just lose the strength to compromise anymore.

My wife understands my stubbornness all too well. It seems the best thing for us is always the last thing I am willing to do. We must understand that marriage is only beneficial when you give up and do what’s best for the both you and your wife. It’s a trait I’m not proud of. If you find yourself fighting constantly, unable to make it through the day without arguing or simply not loving each other like you used to, chances are, someone is not compromising as they should. Perhaps it’s time to give up a little pride, allow her to win, and realize that her love is worth it all; and it really is.